chaos

thoughts are storm clouds mind is thunder and i am just completely inarticulate :((((((( there is this huge bottle within me with the cap on too tight, and also the nets in which i filter my thoughts are clogged, stupid stream of consciousness, stupid and exasperating

affecting my lit (IH) essays. and my comprehension skills. and my writing letters and emails. why.

a very sad thought is knowing that the best you can do is not good enough, that you know what it takes but you do not have the capacity to fit the required bill. some things are just out of your reach not because you do not try hard enough, but because even as you toil, your maximum barely bites the dust. superheroes can only be one place at a time but it also takes the supernatural discretion to decide whose lives are worth more. decisions mostly involve sacrifice but also brings along a raw, scratchy feeling of haplessness. and the only way out is to wait it out, wait for the arrogant walls of air to give way.

break calcium carbonate (people) up into smaller pieces and the frequency of effective collisions increase (and people get a higher chance of hurt)

mhmzhmzmhz. taking too many pictures of the sky takes away the beauty of it when you look at it through your own eyes, i don't know if dubbing things as 'surreal' is an adaptable feeling. living vs existing hammers in my heart.
sometimes i want to hit the night like its a huge pinata and the stars are confetti, sail on clouds over seas of sky and cross the rainbow and walk towards where the love lasts forever